Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Checking In

I'm doing better than last month, although I still feel more anxious and depressed than what should be normal. I have gone to my doctor and we are trying various things. We are in agreement that peri-menopause is playing a large role in how I am feeling.

Eler Beth and I are getting ready to go on our annual road trip, and this time we are going to Toronto. We leave Thursday. I know I will enjoy the trip once I'm on the road, but I would so much rather just be home! I won't let her know that, though. 

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

Depression and All of Its Little Friends

I have been having more trouble with my depression lately; episodes more often and for longer duration. I thought that when spring finally got here maybe it would be better, but it has actually gotten worse. It's that darkness that creeps over me periodically, only it seems to be settling in in a way it hasn't done for many years. Perhaps I need to make a change to my medication.  My anxiety issues are a bit worse as well as my compulsions, and even my RLS has been acting up. I'm sure they are all tied in there together. I'm fifty now and am quite sure I am in peri-menopause, so certainly that must not be helping matters.

I have known the depression was getting worse because I've had to force myself to read books off my TBR pile. Also, other little things that normally would bring me pleasure are now a chore, so I've cut a lot of little daily things out of my normal routine. And the only reason I'm blogging today is that I made little slips of papers with things I usually enjoy doing and projects I've wanted to get to written on them, put them in a bowl, and picked one at random. It happened to be "Blog," so I'm blogging. Whoo-hoo.

Yesterday I had a really bad migraine, worse than I've had in a while. I had a very euphoric postdrome that had me zipping around the house and writing a rather frenzied letter to Barbara before crashing and feeling like crap for the rest of the day. Oh yes, and a crying jag or two went along with that crash. Yes, depression and all its little friends are visiting me, and I don't seem to have the strength to kick them out!